going one month of marriage..

first few month of marriage suppose to be wonderful and sweet. this doesn't apply to my wedding at all, i don't feel sweet and wonderful at all in fact i felt lonely and and like a bird which is lock in the cage. no where i can go but staying at home "RESTING" and doing all the housework. baobei and mother expect mi to do all housework and go no where but staying at home. i know they worry for mi but all i want is to be like last time. where i go no one control. i felt tt i am like a pet got to wait for baobei free then i get the chance to go out. baobei busy all day all time 24hr a day 7 days a week 4 week a month. all he do was to work come home accompany his mother and do his homework and then sleep. hardly ask mi what i have done the whole day and what i really want to do. he only knows how to accompany his family. ask him to go over to my side for the family together with mi. he always push away or find excuse not to go. since tt day we got marry till now he have not gone home with mi to see my family or spent time with my family. spenting time with my family is a waste of time to him. only spenting time with his family is not waste of time. i miss my family so much. but who will understand. not even the person who i call baobei knows. all he know is tt i marry over to his family and i cannot go back to my family and be with them. some time i really think this marry is not want i really want.we get marry cas i have a baby in mi we are force to get marry. how stupid i am to believe that i will feel happy when i get married.now i kown why so many people in singapore don want to get marry and tie down. cas marrying in to a family who husband only listen to his mother but not u and only want to accompany his side of his family but not ur side of family and expcet u to do the same thing is like a hell to u. its like cutting everything or taking everything away from u suddenly after u had spent 20 plus years of ur life with them away. who will understand how i feel? no one. who i can tell? tell baobei? no way. tell mummy and daddy or da jie? no way. they will worry. i don want them to get worry but wat elas can i do but to bottle everything in my heart and not letting anyone know about it.using baby products which mother fren grandchildren used make mi feel tt my baby is like a rubbish collector. i know they want to save money. but not till the limit tt baby pram also got to use other pple use before one then give to my baby use.even the container which contain milk powder one also use other pple use before one. bed also high chair also. is it like rubbish collector. other pple give birth i also give birth. other pplr baby can have brand new things, why cant my baby have too. just cas his or her mummy is useless and cannot get a job to earn money and provide him or her with good stuff and life. i am a useless mum.